A dorky survey.

So I'm obviously bored and you can find random surveys online (mostly for myspace), but I did one and here it is, some of the questions are weird, but whatever:

1.You have 10 dollars and need to buy snacks at a gas station: I'd put it in my gas tank instead
2. If you were reincarnated as a sea creature, what would you want to be? A manatee-they are so cute!
3. Who’s your favorite redhead? Ummm……duhhh :o)
4. What do you order when you’re at IHOP? Pigs in a blanket
5. Last book you read? Geez, I’m reading about 6 right now
6. Describe your mood. Hmmmm, a combo of many things
7. Describe the last time you were injured? Yesterday, I stubbed my toe (as usual)
8. Of all your friends, who would you want to be stuck in a well with? What??, probably my littlest sis-she’s small
9. Rock concert or symphony? That’s tough-probably symphony
10. What is the wallpaper of your cell phone? A pic of my bro and sis
11. Favorite Soda? I don’t drink soda-but if I’m forced-sierra mist
12. What type of shirt are you wearing? An orange long-sleeved shirt I got from target for $6.48-yeah man!
13. If you could only use one form of transportation: a helicopter
14. Most recent movie you have watched in theatres? How sad-I don’t remember!
15. Name an actor/actress/singer you have had the hots for: there are a few but I have always liked Freddie Prinze Jr.
16. What’s your favorite kind of cake? Probably chocolate
17. What did you have for dinner last night? Chic-fil-a-nice and healthy :o)
18. Look to your left, what do you see? My Bible-awwww!
19. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? nope
20. Favorite toy as a child? My little ponies
21. Do you buy your own groceries? Of course
22. Do you think people talk about you behind your back? I’m sure-I think everyone has that problem
23. When’s the last time you had gummy worms? Can’t remember
24. What’s your favorite fruit? A peach or a strawberry
25. Do you have a picture of yourself doing a cartwheel? No, but I have a video of me doing a handstand
26. Do you like running long distances? Yes, especially when I have a lot on my mind
27. Have you ever eaten snow? Yes, I grew up in blizzard country (upstate NY), me and my sisters even tried to make ice cream out of it
28. What color are your bed sheets? brown
29. What’s your favorite flower? A white oleander (b/c it’s deadly)
30. Do you do ballet? No, I do modern dance, and am starting hip hop classes soon!
31. Do you listen to classical music? yup
32. Last restaurant you went to? outback
33. Do you watch Sponge bob? Ummm, sometimes
34. What temperature is it outside right now? Not too cold (very rainy)
35. Do people consider you smart? For the most part
36. How many piercings do you have? Tattoos? 6 and 1
37 Last time you did volunteer work or made any donations? I ushered at church this morning
38. Have you ever tried gluing your fingers together? Maybe a long time ago
39 .How do you feel about your family? Love them
40. Do you have an iPod? nano
41. What time do you go to bed? Around 10
42. What CD is currently in your CD player? Depeche modes greatest hits-love them!
43. What movie do you know every line to? Sadly-labyrinth
44. What is your favorite salad dressing? ranch
45. What do you want for Christmas this year? Christmas has come and gone
46. What family member/friend lives the farthest from you? Where? My bro, SC
47. Do you like hugs? I LOVE HUGS!!!
48. Last time you had butterflies in your stomach? Hmmm, off and on today
49. What’s the way people most often mispronounce any part of your name? my last name-they say ritzbitz and many other things
50. Last person you hugged? My Mom

Yeah I said it.

So a few of you may be “offended” w/the following opinion of mine, but that really doesn’t bother me too much, in fact it kind of excites me b/c there are few things in my life that I am absolutely certain of, have believed my entire life, and refuse to “back down” about. One is my relationship with Jesus Christ, Who He is, what He’s done for all of us, and the unwavering passion I feel to live for and serve Him. The second is abortion (uh-oh), I am absolutely pro-life and I believe God is as well, I also know all the typical responses to this-“What if a woman is raped?”, “What about incest?”, “What about teenage pregnancy?”, “What if the parents are financially unstable?”, “What if the mother’s life is in danger?”, “What if the baby is going to be born w/major birth defects or a serious illness?”. I’ve heard all of these and they are all serious questions, and I admit there are fine lines when it comes to these issues-cases that I could almost see how you could “have the right” to choose, almost but not quite-I don’t know why God “allows” certain things to occur, such as birth defects or serious illness, but I do know that He is God, not us, He creates life, we don’t. I know many woman who feel that they have a right to decide what they do w/their bodies-well, even as independent as I am-I STILL don’t believe that I have the “right” to destroy something that was created inside me-no I haven’t been raped, and honestly I cannot say how I would feel if I was and became pregnant, but I do know that the life that was created inside me is no mistake (God does not create mistakes), and there are options-adoption-a painful process, but I believe a much safer one than running the risk of never having a child again due to the trauma that takes place in a woman during an abortion. I know a lot about the details of abortion-maybe even too much, but I know every different “type” of procedure, I know that a baby (I refuse to use the word-fetus) literally feels every slice of the knife, burn of saline solution, and jamming of scissors into their skulls, there is even a video out there that shows a baby being aborted and how he/she flinches and opens and closes his/her mouth during it. I know this is hard to digest, but so many people I have talked to have no idea how the abortions are performed, they somehow believe that a “fetus” is a blob of tissue that magically becomes a baby upon leaving the birth canal-they’re wrong (you should check out the “bodies” exhibit if you ever get a chance-that will blow your mind), and you can look up what the baby looks life at every single week of development-it’s amazing-I wonder how people DON’T believe in God after seeing those pictures. This is an issue that is important to me-it’s a part of who I am and what I stand for. I love Jesus and I want to truly represent what I feel He would fight for if He were still walking the earth.

God is somehow involved in every detail of our lives, including our formation. The following verses prove more than anything else that God is deeply and personally concerned for every human life-even before birth.


Exodus 20:13 says, "You shall not commit murder."

Psalm 78:6-7 says, "That the generation to come might know them, that the children still to be born might arise and recount them to their children. That they might set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but might keep His commandments."

Psalm 127:4 says, "Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward."

Psalm 139:13-16 says, “For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know them well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.”

Psalm 147:13 says, "For He has strengthened and made hard the bars of your gates, and He has blessed your children within you."

Jeremiah 1:5 says, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew [and] approved of you [as My chosen instrument], and before you were born I separated and set you apart, consecrating you; [and] I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."

Romans 9:11 says, "And the children were yet unborn and had so far done nothing either good or evil. Even so, in order further to carry out God's purpose of selection (election, choice), which depends not on works or what men can do, but on Him Who calls [them]."

Ephesians 1:4-5 says, "Even as [in His love] He chose us [actually picked us out for Himself as His own] in Christ before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy (consecrated and set apart for Him) and blameless in His sight, even above reproach, before Him in love. For He foreordained us (destined us, planned in love for us) to be adopted (revealed) as His own children through Jesus Christ, in accordance with the purpose of His will [because it pleased Him and was His kind intent]."

Hebrews 2:13 says, And again He says, My trust and assured reliance and confident hope shall be fixed in Him. And yet again, Here I am, I and the children whom God has given Me."

This blog has been a long time coming-needed to get it off my chest and please don’t think I wrote it b/c of one specific thing anyone has recently said to me, frequently I remain silent when other people voice their opinions on this topic or others that I may disagree with, and frankly I’m just tired of it. I will even be so bold as to say, how dare anyone ever think that God Himself is pro-choice, that literally makes no sense, it goes against everything God Is and stands for, how dare YOU-a simple finite human being have the audacity to think that YOU can choose if another human being will live or die, (and just to be clear, I am speaking about the innocent, the unborn, not in regards to war or self-defense-that’s a separate topic) the fact is every single creation HAS a creator and trust me-we create the “act” to create life but Who creates that life is another story.

Oh yeah, and do I believe in the death penalty? Absolutely. But how can you be against one form of “termination” and not the other? Simple, I don’t compare innocence to guilt-babies have done nothing wrong, nothing to deserve death, no chance to be born into their sin nature, adults have-we all have “free will”, and the adults who receive the death penalty have decided their own fate-most w/unspeakable acts. Do I think God is for the death penalty? I can’t say for sure, but I am.

As for your opinion; looking forward to it.

A long December...

I guess I never realized how hard Christmas time is for some people, for the first time this year I was affected by feelings of sadness and hurting, not just in those around me, but also in myself. Mine I take as self-pity, which I try not to allow too much of into my life, and Jesus usually yanks me out of my rut (sometimes it takes a few days), but mainly I was affected by certain people around me that I care a lot about. One of my friends that I’ve known since high school’s father passed away a few months ago, another girl that I work with lost her grandfather last week, three other people that I’m close to are going through messy divorces, just to name a few. I am actually thankful that I am able to recognize different circumstances around me that I have never really paid attention to before (during the holiday season). I was able to visit and talk with each of these people throughout this past month and became quite burdened (in a good way I suppose) with what they were going through; I have never experienced the loss of someone I have been very close to, but I can honestly say that I know the gut wrenching feeling of a broken heart, I know the suffocating pain of feeling hopelessly sad, I know how seeing the light at the end of the tunnel can seem almost impossible, and I also know that God heals and God restores like nothing else. It takes time, time, time, and prayer lots of prayer. That’s what I’ve been doing for everyone I know that is really hurting through this season, that’s a lot of what I’ve done for the past two days. This is an odd “season” of my life-lots of soul searching, but the closest I’ve ever been to God-I’m taking it all in, absorbing it, processing it, and checking in with God constantly- it’s interesting-when you give God the reins and sit back and watch Him work, amusing as well, but hard, did I mention hard?

December had some really good times though, the first set of pictures is from our churches Christmas production:

I did my first updo on Siobhan-"Grace", and it actually turned out pretty good! (We were both nervous)
I fell in love w/this little boy/sheep-Tadhg, I put his costume on for each performance, and he always made me make sure his hat was tied "extra tight" :o)

I did these beautiful girls (and boy) hair-Danielle, Stefani, Kate, Corbin, and Madison-so much fun!
This is my small group at church, I got them books that tell the Christmas story and play music-they are Myatt, Sara, Harper, Logan, Emory, and Eric-love them!
My two favorite girls-so pretty and such amazing personalities! (Emory and Harper)
These are my sisters and brother on Christmas-Zach, Olivia, me, Sheela, and Tye :o)

Forgotten Children

Check out this video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qA5q-0ccbjs

Free at last...

Ummm, so I can't TRULY express (in "writing") how absolutely THRILLED I am to be finished w/this semester, I ended up pulling through with a B in anatomy (very good considering my teacher), and at least a B in abnormal psych (possibly an A-don't know yet). God really helped me out, gave me a constant strength (as usual), last week was pretty rough, I blame a lot of it on myself though b/c I tend to procrastinate when it comes to major assignments, for instance I did an entire research paper from 11:00pm to 6:00am last sun nite, and still made a B on it-that's how I roll, sometimes I just need the fact that it's due the next day (by 3pm) to motivate me-wish I could learn things the easy way, but what would that teach me? I am so happy to just catch up w/friends and actually go out to eat and not feel guilty about the fact that "I really need to be studying right now". I'm excited to see what God has planned for my life as well, a lot of times I just want to quit school, but I am not getting the "green light" from God on that (darn!), so I will continue to do what I've been doing-go to school, go to work, volunteer at church, enjoy my life, and remember Who my best friend is :o) I don't understand a lot of what I'm going through but I know the One who sees the big picture and all I can do is trust that-plain and simple. There are two things my pastor once said to always remember: 1.)Remember you are weak, and 2.)Remain mold-able. Will do.

sniff...

From The Inside Out
~Hillsong United

A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame


Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame


In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
Lord let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love you from the inside out


Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

(I love this song)

Pray for me please :o)

This week is going to be CRAZY for me (to say the least), I have 3 major research papers due and a lab practical (labeling a real sheep brain-fun!), I am also spending a major part of the week at church doing hair and make-up for our Christmas production-I will be there tues, thurs, fri, and sat nites, and sun morning-I know I will have a great time though-I always do :o) I just need extra prayer this week for strength and endurance-much appreciation.

"I cannot do everything so I choose those things which are vital and excellent and of real value. I have wisdom and I am able to distinguish the highest and the best things for me to do."
~Phil 1:10

"I cast the whole of my care [all of my anxieties, all my worries, all my concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for me affectionately and cares about me watchfully."
~1 Peter 5:7

Happy Thanksgiving!

Hey everyone! I just wanted to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving, I know I don't get to "talk" to alot of people who read my blog (I hate that!), but I am so busy lately (no excuse-I know), but I love you all so much! I am looking forward to seeing my family this thursday (although I know it will be insane-as usual), I am actually cooking w/one of my sisters (scary!), I'm making my (infamous) deviled eggs, corn pudding, fruit salad, and something else-I'm excited, but by the end of the day I will probably be happy to get back to raleigh. I really want to make a random road trip to the mountains to take in all the gorgeous leaves changing! Anyone interested?

LOVE You Jesus.

Pretty crazy...

So, the morning after I got back from the Joyce conference I came down with a head cold (probably from going-going-going too much) and I haven’t kicked it yet :o( I felt bad for about 2 days and now it’s turned into just a cough-well, being a massage therapist and having a cough…let’s just say they do not mix, you can’t even sniff, let alone cough during a massage-it’s been torture. All that to say; God has really been “acting on my behalf” (1 Samuel 14:6) lately. Let me elaborate, on Friday morning I prayed over each of the clients I would work on for the day (like I always do)-knowing how bad I felt-I asked God for something “extra”, and let me tell you-each one of my 5 clients were overly happy w/their massages-knowing that I had not given my usual 95% :o), I realized that it could only be from One Source-you know it! So, I was truly thankful.

I was also thinking about this: how awesome it is for the Creator of the universe to actually desire to have a personal relationship w/me, to actually care about me enough to offer His help during my massages when I feel bad, Who cares about me, as an individual, a little old massage therapist in North Carolina. Geez…I don’t deserve it, really as frustrated at Him as I get sometimes?, He loves me, us, everyone, so much that it would blow our minds-I think-if we really knew how much. It’s almost too much for me to think about sometimes…almost.

Gimmie some more...

God…I love You so much. I love You more and more everyday. You are the most beautiful thing in my life. I am so thankful to know You and just be able to humbly worship You. Man…

I went to (sadly) my first Joyce Meyer conference in Atlanta, GA this weekend and wow…I guess it’s just really cool to be able to actually see someone you’ve admired and learned so much from. If I really went in to how much I appreciate Joyce-it would probably get boring (to you). All I can say is that through that conference I went to “the next level” with God (by the way I think there is an infinite # of these w/God). This largely had to do with the fact that Hillsong London (awesome!) lead worship, and me and my girls made SURE we were up close (and personal) to the stage (and yes we waited for 3 and ½ hours the first nite-see pic below). I had one goal in mind when I went to this conference-to experience MORE of God and just RECHARGE-both happened (Praise Be to You). I can’t even begin to describe how intense at one point it was for me, all I can say is that I want/crave/desire more and more and MORE of Him.

Some key points from my notes:

~Passion is not a feeling, it is a decision you make.

~What you do doesn't matter if you're heart and attitude aren't right.

~If you don't like your life today it's because of what you thought about yesterday.

~Make things that won't have significant impact on the Kingdom-less of a priority.

~"Break my heart with what breaks Yours"-Hillsong

~The right message at the right time can change a life for eternity.

~Sunday should be a celebration of how you lived the rest of the week-(PREACH it Joyce!)

~God doesn't like when you suffer for Him, He likes when you don't give up in the process.

~When things aren't convenient, look for a way to get creative.

~The only thing that you get credit for with God is your decisions.

~We're dead to sin (when we're born again), but sin never dies.

~Wisdom is to do now, what we'll be happy about later.

~Say out loud each day that you will do whatever you need to do to serve God (and you better have your mind made up).

~When you and God agree-there's no stopping you.

~"Steadfast"= outlasting the devil.

~Taking a good thing too far can be deception.

~In regards to balance: Overly "spiritual" people live in church, Bible studies, and prayer groups-they neglect day to day things (that are important).

~Ask God to show you any areas in your life that are out of balance.

*Joyce talked alot about balance and deception, but it's too much to type, she used alot of real life examples and stories-check out her website for more info.

Looking forward to the next level…

Father God (and) Mother Nature...

God speaks to my heart (mostly) through nature. He often takes my breath away-through a particular sunrise or sunset. How often does He create these beautiful 'pictures' for us, and we are so wrapped up in whatever, that we actually MISS them-how sad-take time today to appreciate the pictures God created-maybe just for you, and then say thank You.

Annoying...

WHAT is it about you?
What!
I'm over it.
Ok, maybe not...
Yeah-definitely AM.
Darn!
Maybe not...
Yes!
No.
We'll see...

All the leaves are brown...

...and the sky is grey. Lately I've been feeling down in the dumps, it's probably due to the fact that I just moved, school is overwhelming, work is exhausting, and all of the other "life stressors" are really hitting hard. Jesus remains my constant steadiness through it all, I've been going through a period where the main thing I've been "hearing" from God is WAIT. The whole wait thing currently applies to many aspects of my life and I seem to be settling into a comfortable obedience w/it (it's brilliant how God knows the very best ways to produce effective growth in our individual lives). Of course He's now moved on to something new for me (which I appreciate), and it is BEING STILL. Being still for any reason is hard enough this day in age, but to be still and listen to what He's trying to work out in us is even harder b/c He does things when He wants to (trust me-this is a good thing for most of us). I will say this; when I am having a major self-pity party, am ridiculously frustrated, sad, tired, lonely, mad, or whatever-getting into God's presence is the ONLY solution I have found that really works, it's hard to explain. The key to coming to God to receive this peace is this: you have to WAIT for as long as you and He needs to, you can’t just say, “ok God I have five minutes and I need some peace!” sorry doesn’t work like that. Now, you may be thinking well, what do I say? A piece of advice (myself included)-NOTHING, if it’s one thing we all need to learn it’s when to just keep our mouths SHUT, my favorite type of people and friends are the ones who say everything w/out speaking-it’s a great attribute, coming into God’s presence is no different, sometimes I just cry, sometimes I just lift my hands up to Him, whatever I feel led to do, I don’t have any guidelines. The place is also important, I like to be outside (where there are usually less distractions), but as it gets colder you just have to find a place that works for you, I’ve even used my closet ( I had a really nice big walk-in closet-but no more!), hey, do what you need to do-it will be worth it-to get that “peace that passes all understanding”-trust me.

Obedience-whew, learning that each day w/God-no easy task. I am thankful for all of these "tests" from God b/c-as Joyce Meyer says: We must all go through the "refiner's fire" (Malachi 3:2). I know I'm going through it right now, and to that I say-burn away God! All of my recent "troubles" are part of it I'm sure. I recently visited my parents church (out in the big town of Creedmoor), a traditional baptist church, the choir sang one of my favorite hymns (I'm a big fan of good old hymns), here's my favorite line:

"When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,When sorrows like sea billows roll;Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,It is well, it is well, with my soul."

I love this line b/c it's a reminder to all who love Jesus, that no matter what your situation is-good or bad-it's going to be ok-God doesn't change-He loves us and comforts us, despite the fact that we definitely DON'T deserve it. Awesome.

When I feel like caving in
My heart my soul is wearing thin
I just want to give up
Nothing seems at all to add up
Can you hear me Lord?
My face is down upon the floor
It's then You whisper in my ear
Be still and Know I'm here

~Storyside B

Unconditional love is...

un-conditional.

Slow motion.

Submerged to the throat

gasping for air

trapped in a bubble

filled with despair

light’s growing dimmer

candle’s burned out

pleading for rain

in the midst of a drought

What am I, a puppet?

no, not even that

tap, tap-silence

“feelings”-FLAT

Answer me quickly!

I’m sorry-just kidding

Did you forget child?

This is MY time you are bidding.

~RlR

A beautiful day.

I just wanted to comment on how beautiful today was. I got up this morning, and when I walked outside to take my pup out-WHAM-beautiful weather-thanks God! As I walked around my apartment complex, I was even more excited at how beautiful it was. Now, there were things that I could have been depressed about, such as the fact that my anatomy teacher falsely believes that we attend Harvard, or the fact that I very nearly ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere. So...moving on-I went to Jordan Lake w/my pup, my sis, her pup and her boyfriend, just in time to see the sunset-gorgeous! All of this “leads me to believe-that You make everything GLORIOUS” (props to David Crowder) and that You made this day beautiful, not only for me, but for everyone that lives and breathes! There is so much in my life that I am thankful for-life itself should be enough, but there is so much more-God wants to give us everything we desire, and trust me I want everything that God wants to give me, but I want it in His timing ONLY, He has a perfect plan for everyone who truly loves Him and all I can do it WAIT, and that my friends, is the hardest part, but will it be worth it? I absolutely trust that it will be worth it, I am learning that every good thing in life usually comes at the “expense” of a waiting period, but I wouldn’t want it any other way-builds character (and so much more) by golly! Every now and then, let me rephrase, quite often we all get discouraged and days like today just remind me Who’s REALLY in control. Now that it’s almost time for me to hit the hey, I wanted to say that I just finished watching (sadly for the first time), Tyler Perry’s “Diary of a mad black woman” and it was awesome! (although I cried through several parts …sigh), I also heard a good quote in it: God has the power to show you WHO’S God, well yes He proved that today :o)

“This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it!” Rejoice I did, and rejoice I always will do-knowing Who’s I am :o) Muahhh!

Side note: the pic above is unfortanately not from today, it's from April 29th to be exact (but that is my pup-Hudson), anyway, I wouldn't have been able to capture today's beauty in a camera-it was all just too much :o) Enough already Rach-go to bed!

Marinate on this.

A word of caution: this is fairly deep stuff (which is why I love this woman), I thoroughly enjoy reading and figuring out really deep thoughts (for ex-C.S. Lewis), this is probably the reason that I love to read and write-if you don't, this post won't be interesting, but if you'll take the time to "read b/w these lines" it will be worth it:

There's a war in the mind over territory for the dominion/Who will dominate the opinion, schisms and -isms/Keeping us in forms of religion, conforming our vision to the world church's decision/Trapped in a section, submitted to committee election/Moral infection, epidemic lies and deception/Insurrection of the highest possible order/Distorting our tape recorders from hearing like under water/Beyond the borders fond of sin and disorder, bound by the strategy of systemic depravity/Heavy as gravity, head-first in the cavity without a bottom/A fate worse than Sodom/What's got 'em drunk off the spirits, truth comes we can't hear it 'when you've been programmed to fear it/I had a vision I was falling in indecision, appalling, calling religion some program on television/How could dominant wisdom be recognized in a system of antichrists and majority rules/Intelligent fools/PhDs in illusion, masters of mass confusion, bachelors of past delusion/Now who you choosin, the head or the tail/The bloodshed of the male, or confidence in the veil/Conferences at Yale discussing doctrines of Baal, causing people to fail, keeping the third in jail/His word has nailed everything to the tree, severing all of me from all that I used to be/Formless and void, totally paranoid, enjoyed darkness as/Lord keeping me from the sword, I was blocked from mercy, bitter than cerasee/hungry and thirsty for good meat we would eat and still dine at the table of deceit/How incomplete/From confrontation to retreat, we prolonged the true enemies' defeat/Destitute of necessity /Causing desperation to get the best of me/Punishment till there was nothing left of me, realizing the unescapable death of me/No options in the valley of decision/The only doctrine supernatural circumcision/Inwardly only water can purge the heart from words/The fiery darts thrown by the workers of the arts/Iniquity, shapen in, there's no escaping when your whole philosophy is paper thin/In vanity, the wide road is insanity/Could it be all of humanity? Picture that/Scripture that! The origin of man's heart is black/How can we show up for an invisible war/Preoccupied with a shadow, making love with a whore, aching in sores/Babylon the great mystery, mother of human history, system of social sorcery/Our present condition needs serious recognition/Where there's no repentance there can be no remission, and that sentence more serious than Vietnam, the atom bomb, and Saddam, and Minister Farrakhan/What's going on? What's a priority to you? By what authority do we do/The majority hasn't a clue/We've majored in curses, search the chapters, check the verses, recapture the land, remove the mark from off our hands, so we can stand in agreement with His command/Everything else is damned, let them with ears understand. Everything else is damned, let them with ears understand…

"Freedom Time" Taken from Lauryn Hill's CD-"MTV-Unplugged"(an awesome CD!)

PS: When I say that I like really deep thoughts-I am usually referring to thoughts that generally revolve around God, there are others though, such as certain quotes and theories that I like, but a lot of that stuff is garbage, there needs to be some "meat" in how you think. I'm just saying...

Perspective.

This is a random pic I found on the internet that I thought was cool, maybe you will too.

The Waiting

Trembling (at times) I wait

Pent up passion

behind a golden gate

The sifter begins its' dissection

through the use of a mirror-named Truth

The revelations are the pathway to perfection



An accustomed sting

paired with pieces of hope

They sing, dance, and prance

unaware of their joke

All the while refinement rants

Aching (at times) I wait



Rippling emotions yield maladaptive ponder

Glimpses of false beauty-introduced

Unguarded desires-beware-the heart will grow fonder!

But...this magnet is rare!

Reality settles...unrefused

Content (for now) I wait



~Rachel L. Ritsema

Got you where I want you...

Recently I have “auditioned” for two things at church (see link in top right-hand corner and COME VISIT), but…have “made” neither. The first was worship team and the second-drama team. On a scale of 1-10 on being disappointed (10 being overcome w/grief), I am a proud 1, this is the God’s (literally and figuratively) honest truth. The reason I was indifferent to either outcome is that I truly WANT to be where GOD WANTS me to be, and nowhere else. I want to serve God in every single way that I possibly can, I never had a “calling” to audition for either of these teams, I just “did it”, and for the record-it was NOT easy. Worship team was like singing karaoke (for me) times ten, and drama team allowed me to regress to about age 10 and pretend I was everything from a person w/giant feet, a 2 foot nose, and a head full of helium, to someone riding on the back of a dolphin being chased by a shark, so no regrets there-good “memorable” experiences.

All of this leads me to the reason behind the title of this blog. I was so worried that I wasn’t doing enough for God, that I needed to be doing more…well, currently, I’m right where God wants me. Let me elaborate: about one year ago, I realized that I had a slight anxiety when it came to children, so I decided to attend a kidcity (our children’s ministry at church) orientation. I was sitting in orientation, thinking to myself that I definitely didn’t want to be any kind of large group leader or work w/very small children, and then I read about a “buddy system” the church was starting, this system was for children who had special needs (although I dislike this term), you get to work one on one w/the kids and communicate w/their parents, and I thought-PERFECT! So, I went home and prayed…and a few days later someone called to inform me that they had a little 3 year old boy named Logan who was autistic-I was so excited :o). I believe the following week I met him and his amazing parents and the rest is history, Logan is truly a blessing in my life. These recent “turn-downs” are all a part of God letting me know where I need to be, I was happy “watching over” Logan before, but now I’m thrilled- it just feels different having that assurance. Now, I wait on God for the next thing, and the next and the next, what more can I do?

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine!

Heir of salvation, purchase of God. Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.

This is my story, this is my song, Praising my Savior all the day long.

Perfect submission, perfect delight, Visions of rapture now burst on my sight; Angles descending, bring from above Echoes of mercy, whispers of love.

Perfect submission, all is at rest, I in my Savior am happy and blessed; Watching and waiting, looking above, Filled with His goodness, lost in His love

Or, in my case, my blessed RE-assurance, thanks God.

One of the current lights in my life-Logan.

So long sweet summer...

Some highlights of this summer:

1.) Got to spend 4 beautiful days at a resort in North Myrtle beach, now you may be thinking, hey myrtle beach is not that special, well the reason this trip was special is that the 4 other people I went with (2 being my bro and sis) were all really chill people, if you know what I mean. I mean that there was no drama (that often arises in groups), I was able to spend time in the morning w/God (awesome) and just relax! The dining out was a different experience, but I refuse to get into that right now.
Me and my sister Natasha and soon to be roomie Lauren ;o)
My sister's roomie Sara and my brother Zach (we were all playing putt-putt)

One of the roughest rides I've been on, I fell off about 6 times :o(

2.) I attended my first “Harvest Crusade”, Greg Laurie was the speaker, thousands of people came out, it was amazing. At first I was disappointed because I didn’t like how Greg was “preaching”, but after some consideration, I realized that it wasn’t about or for me in particular (thus the word “harvest”), it was for new Christians to accept Christ, and accept Him they did, I don’t know the exact number, but I think it was like over 600! Anyway, the crusade was three days long, and I went all three days (although I hate to admit it-mainly for the bands).But, the bands were awesome-David Crowder, Leeland, Tobymac, and Third Day. It was just great to be in a huge arena worshiping God w/tons of other people. I won’t soon forget that.

3.) Went on my first (and definitely not last) missions trip to Trinidad! This was by far the best thing that I got to do this summer. I can’t even begin to describe how awesome the people we worked with in Trinidad are and how much they love and want to serve God. We mainly worked w/the kids-we hosted a VBS (vacation bible school) for them, we also went “door to door” visiting widows and we gave them each a bag filled w/hygiene stuff (which is pretty expensive down there). A big part of the trip was fellowship w/the locals and getting to know them on more personal levels, I think it’s neat that I have friends in Trinidad :o). The island was beautiful and the food was great, I think the “craziest” thing I ate was shark and it was actually really good, although I am usually not a picky eater-I was offered fried chicken feet to snack on, of which I politely declined. I want to go to South America next year, I'm brushing up on my spanish now :o).

My favorite little boy down there-Daniel.

My favorite girls-Janelle, Marissa, and Barbara (Daniel's sis) and the bunny ears is Nikoli. Some of the widows-Stephanie, Evelyn, and Roseanna (keep them in your prayers!).

So, thanks God for blessing me with all of these great opportunites, they have each taught me a lot!

"Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, His love endures forever."

~1 Chron 16:34

Thanks for tuning in, bye now.

Not so Plain Jane...

So… I’ve decided to officially start “blogging”, I was planning to start this on my Myspace account, but for various reasons, decided against it. You guys should feel honored :o), hopefully the “life” of my mind will be interesting.

The title of this blog describes me in a nutshell. I have never considered myself ordinary by any means, in fact I’ve often thought of myself as weird (if you know me you won’t disagree). You see, I feel as if I don’t think like many other people, I often feel as if I’m looking at the world from someone else’s eyes, hard to explain. The basis for this view is largely due to the fact that (quite recently) I’ve fallen in love. Oh yes it’s very true, and for me, hard to believe since that has never happened to me before. Yes, I have loved and love many, but this is different. The fact is, I’ve had this all along and never realized that it was mine, not just to experience, but to live. I feel like I’ve always been wise beyond my years (although I'm sure a few would say otherwise). I have experienced a lot, not only in relationships, but just by living. I can honestly say that, real living has just started for me and it’s a direct result of this love. You may be wondering Who this Mystery is……..well He happens to be my Jesus. :o) As many of you know I gave my life to Christ around age 10. That was a very serious profession of my faith, but unfortunately I never took Him seriously……..until now. I don’t know how or even when, but He came and moved in my life about a year and a half ago, and I’ve never been the same. This change, for me, was significant, up to that point I was working in a place and participating in things and with people that were bringing me down, way down. He was speaking to me-very clearly about some things in my life, and was literally removing people from my close circle of friends, He was also letting me know that my sweet boyfriend of 2 years had to go. The thing with God (that is a routine challenge for me) is that you have to OBEY Him when He asks you to do something, and this boyfriend thing was really HARD, but I did it. I cannot begin to describe the instant PEACE I felt afterward, it was tough for the following year, but God was healing me all along. I started a new job, and honestly, christians seemed to "flock" to me! I also started getting more involved in my (awesome) church and God has been working through me ever since, I am open to wherever He leads :o) Gracious! I feel odd writing all this, but oh well. I guess I just wanted my first entry to be about my “new” found Love and the constant and transforming growth I am just starting to experience. I love Jesus with my entire heart and soul, He is my first love and always will be, He daily leaves me speechless.

My favorite scripture verse changes quite often, this was it for awhile:
“It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ, … He had His eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose He is working out in everything and everyone.” ~Ephesians 1:11

My current favorite:
“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
~Proverbs 19:21